Darkness again

It is still 2pm here, but it suddenly feels dark. I have taken you in a piece of bread, taken You fully and now I realise that this is ALL that makes sense - the insanity of it, if you could say, the insanity is what makes this gift so great. It does not make sense to our human mind. It is beyond all imagination, it is beyond our thoughts, it is beyond our brain - I cling on to You. You know how dark it is for me right now, and yet for the first time ever since these moments have started to come and go, I see this as a good thing. To love you in the dark, beyond the capacity of my brain - means that you are not a figment of my imagination - oh no, you are very REAL and so so so beyond me and my mind - I stand now in the dark, blank but it is fine as You are with me and it is not my mind that is saying so. It is You.

Fill me with your love Lord that I might carry out my duties from now till night time as you want me to. Through your grace let me love my children will all my heart, cook something tasty, go for a walk with my family on the Earth you created for us, sleep rested in You and nothing else.