Teach my hopelessness

You know how I crave for You - after all this is your gift to me, it is nothing of my doing - I yearn to receive You every single day, through your grace. And yet so often I am to stay away. Again I was so close today, and yet could not come to You and be joined to all the souls on Earth, in Heaven and those to come - how I yearn to be united to all. I have no words to express my gratitude for this gift of your whole self in a humble crumb of bread - for coming as close as is physically possible; for allowing us to touch, see, taste You.

And besides all this, you want to give me more! You say, in the retreat, that I now need to learn how to receive my husband as I do You in the Eucharist. When I hear the car park outside our door, hear the door open, his footsteps climbing our stairs - in Ivan too it is You coming to me. Teach me Lord, for I am hopeless, but You can open my eyes to this reality too, if you want to.

"Were not our hearts burning within us while He was speaking to us on the road" Lk 24:32

I adore You Christ, our Saviour - I beg you help me stay with You.

..before I switch off

..oh and before I go, I love you very very much. You know that already right :)
Sweetest dearest of all, keep me and my loved ones as close to you as possible. May we sleep at your feet tonight.

from
your child, tiny me

Transfiguration - light or dark?

What a day Lord. Worried, scared, hoping for You, and finally seeing you shining bright in my husband as he eased my little worries, and I could finally feel his warmth.

Was thinking about the Transfiguration (Mt 17) and was wondering if this was a Light or Dark moment. Peter and James fell on their faces, overcome with fear - was it pure light or pitch darkness, or the Light in darkness? I am with Peter and James face down on the Earth, terrified out of my wits - but what more could we want, when the next sentence is 'And Jesus came to them and touched them and said, "Get up, and do not be afraid." You touch us, and encourage us to keep going, and with Your touch and encouragement - we can.

...ready, steady - am I?

Ok this is my first attempt. Yikes.
Here goes... one, two, three, click!